Charisma is a set of behaviors that have nothing to do with physical beauty.
This is good news for those of us who aren’t fashion models. You don’t need plastic surgery to do these things. Just practice.
Here are the elements of charisma based on research done by Howard Friedman, Distinguished Professor of Psychology at the University of California at Riverside.
[ctt tweet=”Charisma is a set of behaviors that have nothing to do with physical beauty. This is good news for those of us who aren\’t fashion models. You don\’t need plastic surgery to do these things. Just practice.” coverup=”q685V”]
Kinesthetic Responsiveness
Think Kramer of Seinfeld fame when he slides through the door of Jerry’s apartment and discovers something surprising.
Or your grandmother, who throws her arms in the air and bends her knees when she sees you after a long absence.
Or my dog, Little Bear, who dances for joy when I come home at the end of the day.
People enjoy being around people (and animals) with a vocabulary of expressive gestures. Of course you don’t want to be clownish at work and act like Kramer, but gestures that are responsive to what’s happening in the moment and appropriate to the occasion are winning and appealing.
Contagious Laugh
I know a certain VP of sales within the wealth-management industry who inherited a laugh from his father that, once you hear it, will stay with you forever. He was gifted by the genetic gods.
The mischievousness and goofiness of the sound strikes the funny bone. A smile blossoms on my face whenever I hear it.
On the other hand, I’ve twice been asked by male executives to do something about the “unattractive laugh” of a female direct report. I turned down the job, but laughter can be aversive as well as attractive. Whether you’re male or female, braying like a donkey will not win you any friends.
Vocal Expression of Emotion
Isn’t it nice when you call someone on the phone and their voice communicates pleasure and excitement when they hear your name? Even if it’s subtle, it makes you feel appreciated.
A lively, expressive voice is one of the most powerful instruments in the world, especially when it’s resonant and sparkles with changes of pitch, speed, and volume.
Next … 3 more behaviors to try out to come across as more charismatic